Guys: Share your secrets on how to make your favorite provider adore you.

Here are 9 things I make a point to do as often as possible to make my ATF providers swoon for me.

1) Text her to let her know you’re running 15 minutes late, but that you’re still on the clock.

It’s like giving her a free 15 minute break. It will show respect for her time, and it will also give her an few minutes to get ready without feeling rushed. Maybe give her a chance to grab a coffee or answer a few emails. They appreciate that.

2) Bring her flowers. But not red roses or anything too romantic. it will show that she is appreciated, but not TOO appreciated if you catch my drift.

3) Be immaculately clean, and I mean like scrub yourself down with industrial-strength soap, :-) and brush those teeth like they’ve never been brushed, rinse with mouthwash and eat a few breath mints just for good measure.

4) Shave your body hair — but not too much. No stubble. No one wants to fuck a cactus or Ron Jeremy.

5) Compliment her — but not on her beauty. Compliment her worldliness, brains and class. No one wants to be told how “hot” they are. That just gets annoying after a while (I speak from experience).

6) Talk to her like a real person. I know this one sounds so simple, but I can’t tell you how weird I’ve seen guys get when they talk to ladies at the meet & greets. And this one is SO FREAKING EASY. Seriously guys, think about it. You don’t have to put on the charms, pick up on her or impress her. HINT: SHE IS A SURE THING. :-) Just be yourself and talk to her like you’re talking to a co-worker or a good friend.

7) Make it clear to her that you have a policy of only writing positive reviews (9s and 10s). And even then, only at the ladie’s request. Case in point, you will notice that I have zero reviews associated with my profile. This is because I haven’t yet had anyone ask me to review them — I walk the walk, but I don’t talk the talk unless asked.

8) Get that envelope out as soon as humanly possible.

And finally do this ONLY if you really want to be shown an amazing time:

9) Give her a ridiculous tip. I pay my select favorites roughly 150% of their asking price. Consider it an investment. It might not pay off that moment … but do this and here is a small sampling of the kinds of perks you MIGHT receive (no guarantees, YMMV) :

a) Her undivided attention. No clock-watching, texting, phone checking, etc.

b) Really good references for other providers. They’ll go out of their way to rave about you. Eventually, you’ll be able to see whomever you want with very minimal effort or hoops to jump through.

c) A wide-open menu. You know that dirty, kinky thing you want her to do? It’s now at least a consideration if not fully in play.

d) Her personal number, email, etc. Generally speaking, this will mean that you can get through to her right away the next time you want to book her time, and you will take precedence over other mongers.

e) Pics or video to commemorate your time together. This one is hit or miss. But I have a very nice personal video collection that says it’s mostly hit.

f) Lots of off-the-clock perks. And I’m not talking about free sex. I wouldn’t even ask for that. But here are just a few things I’ve gotten from my favorites: Bears tickets (“Someone just gave me these and I don’t like football. You want them?”), Hotel and other travel discounts. And my personal favorite: The occasional call: “I’m out with a few of my friends and we’re at the strip bar. Do you want to come hang out for a few?”

Disclaimer: this will not result in getting free OTC sex, but you might get to meet some of her slutty friends while partaking in some lap dances. Which is way more fun when you’re out with chicks than with your guy friends. By a factor of about a trillion.

Again, I can’t guarantee any of these things will happen for you — but I have had a few of them myself, and I know a few guys who have had similar experiences. As always, your mileage may vary.

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